my lil’ world

Girls. Women.

I am
surrounded by them.

My family is
XX-loaded.

Grandma,
momma, aunties, sistas.

We lack of
masculine feature in our life.

Minority.

The house is
beautiful.

And the hosts
are mostly beautiful as well.

Every time I
step my feet in to the house, I feel thrilled.

My pride is
gone.

My charm just
disappears.

I am here,
with nothing to compare.

They are my
sistas.

Quite girly,
fashionably up to date.

Good looking
is not a proper term to describe their look.

İ qué bonito !

Let’s say hot
chicks, then I’d definitely agree.

Me?

Let’s not
talkin about me.

There I’m
invisible.

I wonder if I
deserve to be da part of this clan.

I dunno. You
tell me.

Dun get it?

Dun worry you
dun have to.

I’m juz
babbling. =]

How to study for a big exam?
These are helpful suggestions from Kendra Campbell, a med student in US:
1. Make a schedule, and try to stick to it. This is probably the most important tip.   Having a schedule provides you with structure, and is a good way to prevent falling into the trap of running out of time in the end. It also ensures that you always have a task at hand, instead of sitting around bored, wondering what you should do. I usually go as far as creating a schedule down to the hour, but depending upon how much time you have to study, this wouldn’t always be necessary.

2. Get up every day at a similar hour. This obviously goes along with #1, but it’s always a good idea. In addition to getting up around the same time every day, it’s also a good idea to "try" and go to sleep at a reasonable hour every night.

3. Don’t forget to schedule in "fun time" or time off from studying to relax. This is incredibly important, and will prevent the dreaded "burn-out." If you’re lucky enough to have a dog (or other pet), take them for a walk, or play a game of fetch. Playing with my dogs is one of my most favorite de-stressors. If you’re somewhat obsessed with cleaning (like I am), take off 20-30 minutes to wash your dishes or do some laundry. Do you enjoy being outside? If so, take a walk around the block or to a nearby park. You may have noticed that all of these activities involve physical activity. There’s an obvious reason for that. Unless you are studying while on the elliptical trainer (which I actually don’t recommend), you are probably sitting on your butt for hours at a time. We’re med students. We know that moving around and getting your blood flowing is advantageous to both your mind and body. Don’t forget what you know.

4. Do questions. This is a great way to learn. Use an online question bank, or one of the thousands of prep books. And don’t just look at the correct answers. Actually figure out why you got the question wrong (and even right), and learn from your mistakes.
5. Don’t study what you already know. This is pretty obvious, but people sometimes do it anyway. Stop wasting your time!
6. Caffeine is your friend. Never forget your friends.

7. Change it up! If you find yourself getting incredibly bored, and wondering if chewing your leg off might actually be a more enjoyable experience, change something! Either change the subject you’re studying, how you’re studying it, or where you’re studying. If you’re lucky enough to live by a beach, go there and crack open your books! It will save your sanity, and also your innocent leg.

8. Take the day or night off before your exam. Don’t forget to do this! I don’t care if you’re behind, or you think you can stuff more information into your head if you keep studying. Don’t do it! And especially don’t stay up all night before the exam. This might be the worst idea ever. Let all those pharmacology drugs simmer in your brain for a while. Give the information time to cement. Have a nice dinner or go see a movie (preferably a completely mindless comedy) and reward yourself for all your hard work.

Well, those tips seems doable. Gotta try ‘em, pals.
(taken from Medscape Medical Students)

Will a good girl dump a friend?

I believe she won’t.

But that makes me be not a good
girl.

Cuz believe it or not I did
dumped a friend.

Didn’t know whether what I did
was a right decision or a wrong one.

Was it a huge relief or
merely a howler.

Not dumping actually but getting
rid of a friendship exactly.

I thought she could be a new
good friend.

She was at first.

Then when we got closer she
suddenly be a demanding kind of friend.

She talked much and never really
listened.

And in a week she started to
exploit my welcome.

A new person who just walked into
my world but already made a scene?

There’s no way I was gonna stick
with this friendship.

I left, hide.

Rejected all calls she made.
Ignored all messages she sent and deleted them from my inbox.

I totally disconnected all
possible links.

Didn’t want to know everything
about her, until now.

This is my real story.

Is this already making me looked
evil?

Well if I tell another recent
story then I perhaps could be a positive bad girl.

I plan to get away –again-
lately,  from a guy whom I call
mr.toohardtotalkless.

Yes, that name already explains,
yeah?.

He loves to talk. Talk about
everything. Everyday.

When he knows I need silence, he
keeps on making sound.

Even after I shout you shut up!
He still won’t.

He likes to psychoanalyze. Think
about this and that and everything thinkable.

Make lots of theories of life as
if he’s the straightest human being in the world.

Okay that’s fine, but judging
me? Nah nah that is annoying!

Think he knows me then sum “great
assessments” on who I am are made up..

Who da hell is he to judge me?

Send me messages every day. I
repeat, every day.

Ask too much questions for a
friend. Bloody curious.

Doesn’t it sound like he’s one
of a kind of my previous no-longer-friend?

Demanding. Pushy.

It’s been almost a year since I
got him close to my every day.

And all this time I’ve been very
patient beyond my limit.

I am tired to “serve” him.

Being fed up of being nice to
him, I back off and minimize the contact.

When I step back, he moves
forward, keeps on asking and trying to pull me back.

The more he pulls me, the more I
wanna push him away.

I realized behind all these
uncomfy situations he is actually a nice and kind guy.

But as long as he keeps on treating
me the way he did, I can’t save this friendship.

I know I shouldn’t just throw it
away.

So mr.toohardtotalkless, I know u r gonna read
it. U r reading it.

Will u help me get thru this?

Treat me properly so I won’t be
the mean girl I thought I am.

Then we can be good friends,
better friends than before.

mommy..

i wish today i can be at home.

seeing you with my eyes.
and hug you like i miss you a lot.

i do miss you.

happy mother’s day, mom..
eventhough i rarely say and show it, will you believe
i’ve got all the love in the world just for you.
i love you the most, mom..
stay with me forever..

i realized this wasn’t my first time hating med school.
i remembered back in the time, i hated it for all the difficulties it gave me.
another reason was i wasn’t really good in remembering things so i hope u could imagine how hard the effort i did when the exams were coming. i wanted to throw up every time i worked too hard, that didn’t feel good at all.
there were some other reasons actually.
i envied friends from other majors who could spend more time to have some fun.
they could finished their education in 4 years, then started to work, had their own money & blah blah blah..
okay, perhaps i have dealt with those things, but lately i’ve got new reason to -again- hate my school.
my school never had fixed schedule of almost all programs.
we never had academic calender, which i could say very disappointing.
students would never know when the exact date of registering new subjects, exams & many other activities.
i didn’t really mind this minus thing until it really bothered my personal plan.
i wanted to spend my holiday in banjarmasin after the short semester ended.
rumor has it that students got 2 weeks before a program called yudisium was held.
i thought 2 weeks would be long enough considering i would probably never had holiday this long next time.
then i went to banjarmasin with all joy since i haven’t gone back home for a year.
3 days after my arrival, i was informed that the yudisium was planned to be held a week earlier. it wasn’t a rumor anymore, it was 100% certain.
owh God, i was completely broken to pieces when i read that message in my cellphone.. i was torn.
i couldn’t help the feeling of losing a precious week that supposed to be mine!!
i supposed to stay longer!
that was the time when i felt great anger inside of me, my school stole my little time.. it was already little time & still it was reduced. STOLEN was the best word!
i only got 5 days remaining..
i shared my time to be with my family, my friends and my home.
this moment was the first time i felt how each second was meaningful, precious.
a week in a year to be in hometown..
how excruciating..
who would say that’s enough?
who would say that’s fair?
it’s never been enough for me.
i will always remember that my school separated me from a place, people & everything i loved..
i know it’s insane to think that way but i don’t really care.
if only my school had fixed schedule, i would have been more prepped.
heartbreaking still, but i thought it wouldn’t be worse.
this was extremely disappointing.
my school was the only one  to blame.
i hate my school!

at last..
im not a moron, to be sure.
wut i’ve been waitin is finally showin up.
my belief in him wasnt really bull.
he’s comin back, to me, to everyone he supposed to belong to.
his return is my great joy, indeed.
no one else i could ever thank enough to, but God.
da One who re-open his eyes and make him look back.
look back all beautiful things happened in his life, including me & people close to us.
hhh..
wut a nice feelin this is.
he’s back..
he really is..
—————————————————————————————————–
get wut i talk about?
c da previous stories 4 details.
=)

this is how i see myself.
a freak. =)
i think i am, for i’ve been mysterious 4 my own self.
it’s not that i dun understand me.
sure i do more than anyone else on da face of this planet.
but sum of me still need 2 b discovered.
it’s more n less like i’m sorta newly teenager whose identity is on search.
n i’m searching 4 final one, 2 b a closure.
i’m really curious 2 invent da real me.
da genuine of Karina.
i’ve been givin it all quite much thoughts.
i hope i haven’t gone mad.
i juz wanna feel whole by deeply familiar w/ every single aspect of me.
when it happens, i’ll stop labeling myself a freak.
this is da way i create my life.
2 make it worthy, meaningful.
how can we live our lives w/out identifying ourselves first?
people,have u recognized urs?

Dear y’all femmes..
Sumtime
i think i speak too fiery, but if i dun throw it up, my cerebrum will get burnt
w/ all these hot ideas inside.
So,
this time i’m speakin bout Elektra & Aeon Flux.
Juz 4get
da background of these movies.
I dun
expect 2 hear there’s another sum1 says these kinda movies r bullshit.
I’m
gonna b very focus in da girls’ appearence n things behind it.
Jennifer
Garner plays Elektra, da marvel’s sexy assassin who is actually a pure-hearted
ninja. Armed w/ 3-pronged spear, clothed w/ light-red tight costume, she looks
so girly plus invincible.
Not
very different compared w/ Aeon Flux –played by Charlize Theron- sexy young
lady, vigorous, whose body covered by black tight costume und.. let’s not
missing this, her haircut is dead awesum!
Look
very carefully on their fighting scenes. Those skills n movements r not
totally special effects. These women learned n trained theirselves da hardest 2
gain body’s flexibility, practiced a lil bit of boxing, wushu n a lil bit of
everythin in fighting. They gave all they’ve got 2 show da audience that these
movies r not cheap n fake ones. It took 4 about couples of months of intense
practices they went through. Being sudden a half gymnast & a half fighter,
definitely not a tiny deal. It was huge, burdensum.
Wut
i’m tryin 2 deliver is that i appreciate these women a lot 4 being so whole in wut
they’re doin, in this case: professionalism of their job. Surely different w/
people who call themselves models who will 2 b naked 4 da sake of
professionalism.
There’s
no guarantee of success in this world, but w/ deep intention n hard working,
we’re gettin hundreds steps closer 2 it.
These
women r undoubtedly strong. Ya think u r?
If
they could, then why can’t we…

U girls.. Check this
out.
Lately i’ve been
thinkin a lot about girls, women.
Thoughts und ideas
racing fast through my mind, realizing me how gorgeous our gender is.. Do ya think da way i do?
Let’s rewind our memories of my fave
movies und take ‘em as referrences.
Nobody has no idea
bout Tomb Rider, r8? Absolutely so.
Lara Croft is a pretty,
hi class, grace, smart, educated, independent woman.
She is either a
person with strong will, courage, completed with great skill of fighting.
All wut’s in her
reflect a nearly-perfect image of a woman..
If this is so, there
won’t b anyman could resist her, but da problem is she could always reject men
for not being at da same level as she is.
Perfection requires
perfection.
Another movie that
shows girl power is Mr & Mrs. Smith.
Uh huh..again i’m
talkin bout da supersensual Jolie.
Here, she plays as a
lead-assassin workin in professional assassin organization.
(duznt make sense
there’s such organization, though).
She covers her true
identity, even to her husband, and becoming an ordinary woman who has common
job and doin wife’s tasks like preparing dinner and sum kinda that.
Outta wut her husband
know, she’s very skilled und trained of murdering.
From this movie I
could say that even a woman is capable doin assassination as good as men. Wooww..

Girls should really rethink
that we have strength so much more than we ever thought we do.
Many other movies illustrate this theme i’m bringin.
Juz wait 4 da next writin.
Girls, realize this, we’re marvelous.

I
thank God for givin me chance 2 b a part of this incredible life

I
thank God 4 creating every inch of me juz da way I look like

I
thank God that I’m destined 2 b born in complete family

I
thank God 4 having parents & sister who luv me

I
thank God for da talents & abilities I own since I was a kid

I
thank God I have lots of bestfellas who colours my teenage days

I
thank God 4 all of my unpredictable
lucks

I
thank God 4 approving my prayers uncountable times

I
thank God I could walk in da path where I stand now

I
thank God 4  all da happiness I felt

I
also thank God

For
da blue, troubles, & disasters I’ve ever been through

Cuz
I faith, nothing’s happened without reason

I
thank God for my destiny

And
all that have been planned for me

I
thank u God, for everything..